Other Name. -M.Weisgerber

She’s the only one whose potent
Ink on my page is caught, drawn in
Tones of teal on bars of silk;
Pausing nearby respiration or else
Taking time to break our nostrils wide.
 
She is my sweet automation,
Encyclopedia of misconduct open
To misconstrued answers, guts, and so many bugs!
Curved from knees to feet, hand to bleed
Sweetness in of my lips to part, not sharp, not
 
All the things I need or yet still wish to be.
A ships steel sunk to need –sleek, and deathly proud,
Curl her toes to the point tip, a rune to rub, a
Vein to poke or capture, or with such love to and
Then dance these nights away.
 
Forgive me, I peeked at the sight
Bare bottom exposed then to summer sun.
You don’t notice your care, you curse, your cars are
Filthy now, broken glass in chocolate melt
taking time swerving on busy streets.
 
This kindly place, all of stone,
Here, where we had written to exchange,
And then I to die in (of?) ecstasy, or perhaps
For another moment, another love,
Another name by which to fail its all only just the same. 
 
A timid pattern yet to break. 

Initial Meeting (7/27/2020). -M.Weisgerber

Oh gods am I going to catalog every inch & twitch & turn of her?  I know
the way it was meant to be, I, not wanting to be in this hot place, her a bit
bored with intonation, not realizing that she’s going to claim a heart, I,
 
carrying a dreadful secret, so much pain & shame & hate of the hard days
moving the very way a brain could bake or shake, longing for cold surf, I
thinking she’d just be another number, her not realizing I was hers to take
 
down, then I came to love her most, the way were in time, the simple way
she hated and loved me to the point of choking strange shapes out of me,
my throat down upon the lane that those 50’s people wandered?  Streets,
 
her long drive, a strange sub where streetlights burned so very bright
against the dark before I entered, green grass against silence passing – it
is a swamp though which a heart could yet not drive it.  Out?  No, soon.
 
Oh lord, I think it is true, & in the first glance I had, you so tall, you so
self-assured & everything in between, reminding me of love as I lost my
self upon the heat, the scent, the very way glanced beside August fire,
 
cooking its way fast through the last of summer days, in a land I didn’t
want to be with a girl I didn’t then or yet as know didn’t want to open
or unfold, mostly from fear, mostly from the open heart getting shot again
 
she hoping to take me for a change, care for anyways – for a little while?
Didn’t know I needed to claim her too, didn’t know shame would not be
coming with self perseverance, or yelling, or passing or failing all, no.
 
Oh pain, oh lingering doubt red amongst the folds, a probability aligned
with the stars, the very moon, the high noon was gone as soon as I
learned to disagree; fickle then, heart so bold.  Don’t have to glance back
 
at the starcharts to find a match, somehow knowing the moon was full,
the very way she sat with long boot out tapping I assumed I made mistake
she’d fill me in as I would her soon enough in time, this lie, almost free..
 
“You can’t love her” they say, but on that Dante would disagree,
the pen shivering upon my knee, the tastes lingering on the lower lip the
quavering of a solid breast breaking upon the way we made up the rest.
 
Yes, we are ghosts within, woke upon the machine, yet
Somehow its all beginning to make slow perfect sense now, it’s
patterns form, the day give way to the temporary shelving disbelieving.
 
 
 
Sure, my first wrong thought was how to get you hot to bed, yes
My first impure passions gave way to need, tears, yes, all the subtle
Simple ways I came to love you weren’t worked out till the very end, yet
 
you claimed me, shamed me, unwound me thread by thread so that I,
simple fool that I came into this world as was, ready now for fighting, be
at call n beck for the way you bend your knees, back needing cracked,
 
Pop of jaw and flex before you held me, it was swell that we played days
On days of NEW, yet I never saw you sew!  Never once baked bread, no
didn’t meander boardwalks nor hold hands, separate ways drifting close,
 
her fast lips caught amongst the balm, the way she drank & cried fast of
her lost dad, & I then found my armor gone; I found my heart shift & I
somehow knew then that a day, a year, a lifetime would never be enough.
 
Could you see the bright sun on the wood of the places I used to play?
As a boy how much they meant, how I wanted you there, to stay, do you
know what it is to fall babe, new contagion on the land as the sun sets?
 
Oh God, these words like meeting your face are likely just a curse
to call at the many lovers that follow such strange paths, out onto the
Land mary countryside or what remains by the time I am done, for
 
I burn and yearn and want all that grass in all the countrysides that have
ever been to molt to char to turn the way your subtle look made ash of
piles so out of me, that log in fire trying to call out, forward, prepare, yet
 
margarita before the beer, hard to believe its going to be at least a year
before I miss the way we loved, love the way we kissed, missed you more
than a heart should could bare before it fractures, swollen so, chinks lil.
 
Thirty-three, striking out like Jesus does upon this strange merry land
chatting up stranger words, odd lyrics, that are beginning to be beautiful
somehow before the sun sets, before rain cools chiminea burning, all is
 
heat here, the sweat it is pouring so hard so fast so whenever you are near
Down.  All fall
Down.
 
I came to a fire beside a shore, a cantina upon the bend to claim her, but
in the end it was me and we and all these foolish words that only time can
mend then matter, & the way we once danced upon hard surf.  All is hard
 
here
and in time it all falls
drown.

You Hated (10/21/2020). -M.Weisgerber

You hated lying in that grave of a body that for so long made

up all the bitter hairs the fruit, the teeth rotting out between your smile, I 

hating the way this bed is larger now, so empty there that the thought of mad

ness goes way further than your lost deeds or mine.

You hated the way I grinned, loved there in the dead of night with I and this sickness 

missed you so much as to fret and worry and I didn't think to sleep or nod or drink since

deep of that poisin you tend to so deep, its well runneth over 

beyond your back gate, the far stoop, out the drive out to where your land ends where

the wood it rots, my heart it rots, the heat it rots it out too, all

the very last sweating part of hatred that I have for anything as

the grave opens wide and I tumble right in, by

your arms only now by your sides (when all I want, the molecules themselves crave to fall right in)

You hated that body of a grave so long, that I started to wonder why I cared and I and if

that tide could ever be beat (I should have fallen right in, swam so out to see) and I

out on the front porch now having to glance back as I walk away and I wondering if

the nails will give away and that timber one day will simply cave on down, inward.  

Take this hammer then, see what goodness a head can hold.  

Swing batter batter...if only one for park, then try one for the road.

Benethe the Miller Sign of Higher Life (5/25/2020). -M.Weisgerber

"Will you love me?"  she said, looking scared, seeming now arrested beneath wide sheets, my

hands clasping fast, face turning with the day outside, confusion on the mind slowly gaining;

a slipping sort of mental fatality growing deep.  Wheezy with the realization, garbled, mangling.

Falling fast beside the long fields.  

For we pretend met then in Dallas beneath the hot sun, the tarmac waiting, calling so for

your breath bating the threat of a dark horse arriving, in that she subtly asked

"Was your trip good?  Did you see all there was to do?" I not knowing what best to say

both of us now without clothes, her laying sideways as we always know time is slim.'

Yes the simple days would have passed thus in a haze, yes we would have lost ourselves, woulda

stayed the stout same caring yes I cared yes it matter(s)ed, yes its coming round rain again, yes its

falling fast now certainly its a strange tilt, the brightness grows, mortality holds

thick indeed as the bludgeon calls again, indeed its failure before the eyes fast a growing.  

Feeling thin, feeling any which way then to turn.  

To burn.

"Where do you want to go next?" I asked, flipping through the tube, the many brochures

lying thick round in a fan untouched from the day before, the digital clicking down

I think then we both were aware that we arrived on borrowed time, stranding continental divide

living the best between the stuffy sheets, the pieces of you and me - Mexico, I should thus say.

I content to watch her from any such cot through the long day, help her pack the undies

that both of us sometimes drop between the giggling, those tiny shards barely fabric

she enough to wind and love me, the simple ways we knew each other long, compatible in red

The Mississippi's that rage between us.  

The day receding round, the lack of caring of all other things as we held

yes the fucking WE made, going insane, going down another hole together 

yes the small parts simply mattering, yes that 3D Wolfenstein a calling, the ultimatum beginning 

Yes I cared and love, and now I have so little time to say, to hold her.  A little more time.  Please

I now make up the clouds begin to form beneath the crystal shape of a weeping eye, your

days make up the passions I hold, and though simple they for me are the great, the escape.

Anywhere closer to your love, your frame.  

Yet Dallas does not relent in heat yes the breweries called, yes

the art scene staggered uncontrollably yes the tempered winds blowing behind us now, yes

the very flat of the land is something that calls us outward, onwards - this is

what they call winter here, and sure you simple open pustule busting fell for my insanity yes

I tell her again and again the words that matter so.  The shoes scuff.  Witness marks hold us close

more honest than we ever knew ourselves.  Yet we have to look!  Gaze upon the Gorgon's maw, fall

into that fast love that maelstroms could not shake us, she, bleeding dearly, I this open wound

twisting open for a knife that has not been crafted for me to receive.  

I forever will be in love with you yes I made these words, the scenery up instead.

So the flat day moves on, the winter sun hangs low, yet 

"Will you hold me?"  she asked again unto the breeze, her long

neck pushing close, my hands these bitter things crafted just to mend.

"Yes," I said.  Forever and always, yes thus I meant, hopefully said latter part out loud.    

Wanted to take away such pain, only adding such instead.  

All Seasons (11/5/2020). -M.Weisgerber

Oh lover oh lover, look her at all the fall color!  It matches

you hair, the soft folds of that perfect dress look so

marvelous, alive as we turn and dance and as we revel

in so much simple candor!

Oh lover oh lover, when then can we thus be in love forever?

For winters first frost only adds to such astounding charm, the 

sun catches you just right on long lashes as you lean in for the long kiss, a

beau, a beauty, my lovely so!  (How I am smitten, I am slain!)

Oh lover oh lover, in your arms I find springs slipsilver luster, a

playful time for banter!  You are the bounce in my step, as we

stroll across the meadows, the park, all - a garden in your very eyes.

Your hands were made for holding, and in time you took mine...

Oh lady my lady, you are my land of eternal summer!  The

grace by which to sing about, the distant lightning in soft night 

skies rolling over, a hard clap, whispered rainfall washing out upon this 

opened soul, begging so for the love and wishes and moments made for two.

It is the fine wine of loving utterly, lost so in your draft 

a bit of gold for your loving, gentle hand

a nearing footstep on the dusty moor

the way I love you now, and (get ready for it! XD) yes, forevermore.  

your cat is misssing (11/11/2020). -M.Weisgerber

then my heart stops, the worry rising too, oh God

where did I place our bags, the heat rising over the day, your

strange face being lovely so, so hot, so sticky sweet yes, yet

where can a lady hide: the house is only so big!

the dog is where she should be yes

my gato is passed out on the lawn yes

i realized real quick i'm surrounded by fems, you

are one of the braver ones yet this is signaling now of the end

did we check the house, canvas the yard??  I don't know

what to do, where to go, what to say, how now best to love you, the

day goes on, the beach it calls, oh god I lost my job, my life, my girl, a hope

...a wife?  (coulda, woulda, shoulda...but not this time it seems)

so much road to travel down, so many tears yet to cry, yet

honest to god I always think my life was meant to end there in the surf, the waves;

the Carolina sunset where all dreams must eventually go to rot.  

To die.

where did I put the car keys, is it my turn yet to drive?  the

day grows hot, our tempers quick the whole rest of the day written here

a sigul best to keep, all the treasures told, but I should have known it then

the moment I didn't think, it was over when your cat had snuck away.

Oh, she's here in the foyer - time the to really start the day!

Leaf Rake (11/12/2020). -M.Weisgerber

First morning, of the rest of our lives!  Its

brisk out here, me tripping over everything in your garage, waking you up, along

with the dead passings, finding the tools, traipsing over ten years of your gentle planning, all

you the witty ways you placed those knickknacks, the clever things, making honest sense.

You unsure what silly I'm about to do, me piling light fluff in a pile before your dog jumps in

Laughing past the cold, working hard to beat the snow (thinking of planting grass seed in spring)

The first time over, the first moment to claim a heart, the first wonderful way I'll sneak 

up on you from behind not for fear, only for a goosing, then a hug, then more love (repeat all around).

The lawn isn't dead, just covered.  Your fears dissipate with cheek on cheek, a flush, another

rake pull and I am whole, another bag open and I have worth.  A house, a girl, her heart, this world.

I don't need to glance up to sense you gazing down, a high porch, a worry-wort, another night, the one

where she invited me inside!  Oh, a lucky guy, feeling great, feeling strong, another bag

out now to the curb cuz you know its funny how ten years of trouble can vanish in a hug, yes

I love you, yes I want that evenly yoked amazingness you casual mention after dark, yes

I want to keep these timeless treasures eternal (even as you 'harrumph', trying to figure me out!)

You didn't know what this means to me, allowed to clean, allowed to care, allowed

to go at my own pace, to run my hands through your hair, pull that lovely sideways grin in

close where kisses can occur, the joy of how I always enjoyed doing this as a kid, missing home.

(your dog rushes over!)

Soon I'll be in, soon too tea will be made and we will laugh and make cheer, there

is love there and it is right here and all the simple slow words make perfect sense.  

...next week I might start in on some decorations then in earnest!  XD

(like everything else, that is...if you'll let me!)  XD

Your Birthing (9/4/2020). -M.Weisgerber

There is a line in the sky drawn from me to you,

out to the horizon, out to the part where the better part it 

calls out of the blue, clinging fast to threads of the world

there, everywhere, there is a strong hill calling fast as...as

As the angels weep, as the dead the stupidly blind call for

release. 

As they witness what should and yet shall be.  

How can I, how should I, be, there, always

when you wont, can't simply make it

shake it, bake it, can't always then or 

what it simply seeks tries to be.

See it for it is in we, see

the waves glancing there, rolling off the topaz sea, see

tired then of trying oft to be thee, that

exhausted part, trying only to be.

Me.

You can't go, can go

(gotta go)

call it what is is

call

call it 

call ME

just call it what

call

it what it needs to 

be.

Just call, 

it is

what it is 

just another, your brother, it is

another...another...

call me then in a maybe far away

call me then there on, another day

Clinging fast to the fine lines, the thread

As the angles weep, as they scream out, cry then for release.

How can I, should I love, take a hand and heart

when you wont, can't make it, take it, shake it

see what it seeks to be.

See it for what it is in WE, see

the waves roil in the hard wine, an ocean, the sea

tired then of trying to be, exhausted

being me.

Screaming then, that 

petty thing.  

Down now, lost then to

another mind.