Reminder (9/26/2019-5/29/2020). -Others and a Little Bit, of ME

"Sept 26, 2019

Mark,
I wanted to send you a few things
to remind you of home.  And to
remind you of our love.  I am
very happy that you appear to
be settling in and that your new
job is off to a good start.  I am
so excited for the new
opportunities that have come your
way and will continue to arrive.
I look forward to celebrating
your success with you.  And
you know I will be there (here?)
for you in tough times as well.
I miss you a little more each day,
I love you and I love us.

(Heart)"
Her.  You.  What
Once
Was
and
Never
Meant to
BE.

No love, I haven't forgotten, yes
I hold these words so true, oh
God how they burn they curse they
at the moment don't ring so very true. 

I didn't make it, settle, in, we didn't last,
what then is the purpose of the words, when
all is lies, all is broken, all time
has passed.

There certainly was no home, there isn't now any love, your
not all that very happy, the job has failed and gone.
I've certainly collapsed apart there's nothing left to rate of celeb's, you
really didn't care, when I most really needed you, you certainly

were not there.

I don't think that you now much miss me, our love it fell apart, I
don't want to hurt or hit reset, I
don't think I have the time, the patience, the heart.  I
really want to love you, I desperately want these words to be true, I

wanted them to be so then, be so now, I...god love, I
still very much am in love with you.
I want to send YOU some small things, I really
want/need/crave/desire a home.  I really need some love, love,

before its said and gone.

I really need to matter, I need someone to care, I
think I've once more stumbled, again, I
really wish you cared.

No more from the table, no more in the halls, this world its all
of darkness - its broken, now I continue the fall.

So take these words from you to me now then back to you, may
it shine a light on all the bad things, may it be an omen true, may
its simple words have mattered, may your heart carry you far away, for
we all are soon for bed, and even my name....I guess it didn't matter anyways.

Adieu.