Showers Cold & Simple - M.Weisgerber

This is a movie frame, and I
am bathed in electric light.
Audiences bored at the trying drama,
but this is my life:  fast forward.

I wander at night.
Do not know where I go.
Thoroughfares transversed.
Hint of canopies under shade with midway shine;
August boughs leaning down to run
twiggy fingers through my locks.

These eyes are now unwilling or unable to rest
mostly consist of pupils, seen not, but seen enough
not reflections caught    ----    glimpsed, revered.  Held.
Oh, God, can you hear me?
Can I even hear myself?

Where now will this go?

A Song for Juno - M.Weisgerber

This story begins, when i was 64
I looked at my life, and the meaning of the world.

Cuz when I was 13, i fell in love with love,
Didn't have a clue what to do, and spent my nights alone.

When I was 15, figured out what to do!
Stayed after school, asked a girl if she would love me too.

When she was 15, she figured out what to say;
She denied my attempts, and then she went away.

So when i was 16, I fell for another girl,
she fell for a girl, then she shook my world.

Then I was 18, I again fell for love,
But love from above came and tore it up

Then again, when I hit 25 I felt so alive
I tried to drown my lungs, but dammit I survived.

When I hit 34, they told me to look for so much more,
Said date a man if you can, and be a happy lad.

When i was 35, a man did try to take my hand,
I laughed at him and said "NO WAY"

Now I'm 64, and done wishing for so much more
Found revelation of  God in the barn, then cried a lot.

Forgotten Colors - M.Weisgerber

Another red plug
here, waiting patiently
on this crisp porcelain.
Not mocking, merely resting
spooning the dust motes
and any simple bathroom grime.

It never traveled far,
sought out Ganges dreams,
or strange glances
at the back of dank bars.
A view of the waste dump,
is the best it can hope now.

It could have waited here,
knitting strange tomes
watching shapes pass, tall
heads stuck far above nimbus,
with eons passing easily
or another hour gone by.

But still it found me
quickly without camouflage,
helped entice me to burn
merely with its shape.
A Cheshire smile;
I recognized its tale.

Immediately hated short nights
of quiet trepidation,
bathing deeply within
gentle joys of discovery.
But hating more
all the shifting walls

made merely by this color,
curling like the toes,
sturdy as the girl
who existed to make it
hold it, mold it,
yank it to my floor.

What am I to do
if...when I find another?
Char its sweet end,
or feed it to the first?
Hope that it turns blue,
dies from its own stench.

Another will serve
as a reminder of more
that once we engaged in it,
and it was good.
Felt better than good,
bordering on great.

But great is not enough,
not for the red color,
red must be fed "incredible"
red must not be made aware
of mistakes allowable,
even if red errs itself.

But I am an artist,
and this color
remains as one -
many is my palate
by which to craft,
to create something bolder.

We are meant to avoid
mixture of such dense flavors,
because orange is stronger still,
something once possible from we two;
it is trauma overcome,
and thus could never be.

Light Pursestrings

This morning I reached a hand inside
and pulled out two pens from dark fathoms,
both engraved with inch long hearts
each ebony - neither from here.

Odd, as I had not thought of crafting today,
of placing fine tips to weary paper,
watching the figures twist and grow
from nothing, catch fire then return to same.

Born: hardened warriors that steal my graphite,
start to sketch themselves unnerved,
with chain-mail coated ice cream colors,
battle axes of cotton candy repute.

Or a biker clothed in mime apparel,
face covered in acrylic dusty blues accents -
an owl, unfurling its birth coverlet
sailing skies with one wing detached.

I fondle these light wrappings,
exclaim soft cries of pleasure from such joys held -
taunt noises that emerge from the inner tappings
of pen upon glass, glass held on paper.

The crinkled noises catching in brain webbing,
mutating to larger girl sounds, of laughter
echoing off noiseless kitchen floorboards,
wall cupboards reminding me where we almost made love.

I suppose these surprises are getting easier;
every sugar-bowl lid hiding another jumpy mouse,
which neither bites too assuredly or for too long
but still rests their regardless, ready to pounce.

Me, debating if I need sweetener for this morning joe,
or if I can handle the bitter blackness, necessary
to wake me after many late night rainstorms.

I Am (or more aptly, The Constant Gardner) (7/24/2012). - M.Weisgerber

When last I fell into love,
I knew all the right things
& therefore said them.

When cast out doley,
I wrote till pen & heart were dry
Nimble now, such a fractured thing beheld.

I am now content to watch,
Peer into a blue that breaks from darker water,
Or cry out, to send inner beasts back into deep wilderness:

It is a composed passion, these things.

For when I first awoke into this life,
I talked like a man, fought like a god
& doing so, watched the world burn.

Upon awakening to the shambles of a new day
I relearned how to grow quiet calm,
subtly pick at the many weeds that reared their ugly heads.

I spoke, therefore I am.
I hated, therefore I am that too.
I love now, and seek a brighter future:

That has made all the difference imaginable.

Shattering of the Blood-Stained Darts - M.Weisgerber

Sharpest Fracture -

Goodbye, dear constant soldier of the night

Headstrong; he who taught me how to fight.

What can we say, to him whose life betrayed

himself, daily - now frozen, never to grow old

Never again to laugh or cry.

You supped upon their finest poison,

drained that crystal chalice in a fell swoop,

stumbled to the nearest window

and awaited the coming of the dawn

with a new sense of urgency.

We are those left with boyhood memories,

of many good times through the woods

of endless futures never quite set.

We forged bonds of weight n stone,

gave meaning to all the insane wanderings in the dark.

We laughed... what is there left to say?

You led us first and foremost, and lead us again now,

apparently a marked man destined for an endless night.

Hope now, in your chilled embrace

fated for the fire.

Royal Woods - M.Weisgerber

There is a girl, who managed to earn a place under my skin

Not sure with fine precision or just weakness of mind;

She is there to stay, to root around like so many gerbils nesting.

Held precious, but mentally removed with much disdain.

Held, I say, because I asked her to enter and stay,

made room amongst all the decent clutter.

Precious, I say, because I realized far too late

what little that was caught, was far more than friendship.

I...

I dreamed of my city darkly, no windows;

everywhere an endless sea of wood beams.

People smirking over a cup of tea.

Always watching; a faint glow that was all becoming.

I meander here along a Seine that never existed,

dreading the waking, and the screaming that follows.

Saw her hair at a distance, riding that broken red bicycle

and always seeming to ride away, always laughing so.

Follow me down, past the edge of the quai's,

to where our favorite colors collide, hallucinogen times;

those crafting a scene I will remember when down,

drawn up and drugged against a better state of mind.